What can we do to stop others’ comments from undermining our self-love?

Self-love is accepting and loving one’s self-image. This doesn’t mean that you have to stay the way you are and keep loving yourself for that. No, this is not the meaning at all. Accepting and loving one’s self-image just means being aware of the parts of our nature we are working on, and accepting that working on them is necessary.

What happens because of this awareness? For instance, you want to improve your memory or be better at maintaining relationships, and you are slowly improving yourself in these areas. Now, if someone points a finger at your forgetfulness or comments that you have poor skills in maintaining relationships, you will not get disturbed by their comments. It is because you can tell yourself that, ‘Yes, I know that I need to work upon this area, I am working on it, and the task is not complete yet!’

Even if someone passes a bad comment about us, the love and respect we have for ourselves should not diminish. Being aware of three things will help us in this. First, what is it that is good in us? Second, what is it that we need to improve upon and we are working for that improvement? And third, which is the most important one, what is it that we know is within us, but it is okay even if we don’t change it on priority? For example, someone tells you that instead of walking only for half an hour, you should walk for one and a half hours. But, you know that you can only spend half an hour walking because of your daily schedule. Now, you know that you don’t walk for one and a half hours, but because you are aware that you don’t need to change this, not walking for one and a half hours doesn’t diminish your self-love!