Difference between Love and Desire to Love

Suppose that you are asking someone about what their favorite thing is and they answer you that ‘fitness is my first love’ or that ‘I am fitness conscious.’ And later, you ask them about their routine and then they answer, “I wake up at 7 am. Then I have breakfast and get ready for the office. I go to the office by car and then ride an elevator to go to my workstation. By the time I go to my workstation, I get so busy that I have lunch and tea or coffee at my workstation only. I complete the work by 7 pm and then return home in my car. It takes me about an hour to return home because of the traffic in the evening. Once I am home, I have some snacks. Then I have dinner, watch some TV and spend some time with my family before going to sleep.”

The most obvious question that you will have would be, “just a little while ago you said that you are fitness conscious. Do you want to be fitness conscious or are you indeed fitness conscious?” These two things are different because what you love is what you spend more time on a daily basis with! If you love something or someone and find no time to be with them, it is a mere desire to love and it is not love.

If you say that you are fitness conscious, then in your daily routine, there must be some time to go to the gym or do yoga or pranayama. If you say that you love your child and you cannot even find half an hour to play with your child or spend time doing what they want to do, then you only wish that your child would be dear to you. But this is only a desire for love; it cannot be considered love if it is not in your daily routine.

Whatever you love and whoever you want to have a loving relationship with, you can express that love by being with that person and connecting with them on a daily basis; only then can it be called love; otherwise, it is a mere desire to love.